• RSS Queering the Church

    • The Evolutionary Value of Homosexuality. November 27, 2014
      Researchers at the University of Portsmouth have suggested that the evolutionary value of homosexuality lies in its ability to promote social bonding.  Dr Diana Fleischman and colleagues found that in two groups of heterosexual men and women respectively, just having homoerotic thoughts…Read more →
      Terence Weldon
    • Mississippi Court Lists the Reasons for Marriage. November 26, 2014
      Two more American courts, Arkansas and Mississippi, ruled yesterday in favour of marriage equality and struck down the voter – approved constitutional amendments which prohibited same – sex marriage. Here’s the current Wikimedia map for the marriage equality state of…Read more →
      Terence Weldon
  • RSS Spirit of a Liberal

    • Gonna Stick My Sword in the Golden Sand September 15, 2014
      Gonna Stick My Sword in the Golden Sand: A Vietnam Soldier's Story has just been released. The title comes from a stanza of the gospel traditional, Down by the Riverside, with its refrain--"Ain't gonna study war no more." Golden Sand is a bold, dark, and intense retelling of the Vietnam experience through the eyes of an army scout that is […]
      Obie Holmen
    • Gay Games Symposium July 21, 2014
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      Obie Holmen
  • RSS There Will be Bread

    • Where Are You? October 26, 2011
      Greetings to all others who grace these pages! Thank you for stopping by. If you still have a reader pointed here, this blog no longer publishes in this location, but can be found at this new link. Please subscribe to the new feed, get the new blog via email or read us by liking us on Facebook or by following me on Twitter.If you want more, please feel free […]
      noreply@blogger.com (Fran)
  • RSS The Wild Reed

    • Quote of the Day November 25, 2014
      If your concerns about violence are limited to property damage and looting, and you have never shed two tears for the history of institutional violence, murder, colonialism, segregation, lynching, genocide and police brutality against peoples of color, your words mean nothing; they mean less than nothing. Your outrage, in such a case is grotesque, an inversi […]
      noreply@blogger.com (Michael J. Bayly)
    • Prayer of the Week November 24, 2014
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      noreply@blogger.com (Michael J. Bayly)
  • RSS Bilgrimage

    • Ferguson Again: Why Things Are Burning November 26, 2014
      And, no, I can't let this day pass without sharing more excerpts from articles I've found well worth reading, about the Ferguson story. Because it's simply too important to ignore, no matter how much  my harping on it may irritate some readers of this blog:Charles D. Ellison on how St. Louis County prosecutor Robert McCulloch played us all:The […]
      noreply@blogger.com (William D. Lindsey)
    • Talk About Ex-Gay Conversion Therapy Not Working: Update on John Smid Story November 26, 2014
      I've blogged about John Smid and his remarkable story a few times in the past — here and here. As these postings note, Smid previously headed a faith-based "ex-gay" program in Memphis called Love in Action. He and the program came on the radar screen of many folks in 2005 when Zach Stark, a young teen, was sent to the program by his parents ag […]
      noreply@blogger.com (William D. Lindsey)
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  • RSS Far From Rome

    • the way ahead March 23, 2013
      My current blog is called the way ahead.
      noreply@blogger.com (PrickliestPear)
  • RSS The Gay Mystic

    • The Cross of Garabandal and the death of Joey Larmargino November 25, 2014
      Garabandal seen from the PinesA little bit late, but I just heard of the death of Joey Lamangino, the blind man who became one of the principal apostles of the apparitions of Garabandal, Spain (1961-1965). Joey passed away on June 18th of this year, and shortly thereafter his New York Garabandal Center was closed. Only a tiny remnant of true believers still […]
      noreply@blogger.com (Jayden Cameron )
    • Still alive and kicking November 11, 2014
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      noreply@blogger.com (Jayden Cameron )
  • RSS The Jesus Manifesto

    • 借入しすぎを防ぎたい February 26, 2014
      自分でこれ以上借りないと思っていても、ついつい借りてしまう浪費癖が治らないそれならいっそのこと、借りれなくしてしまえばいいのです。日本貸金業協会の貸付自粛制度とは貸付自粛制度とは、資金需要者が、自らに浪費の習癖があることその他の理由により、自らを自粛対象者とする旨又は親族のうち一定の範囲の者が、金銭貸付による債務者を自粛対象者とする旨を日本貸金業協会に対して申告することにより、日本貸金業協会が、これに対応する情報を個人信用情報機関に登録し、一定期間、当該個人信用情報機関の会員に対して提供する制度です。登録手数料等の費用はかかりません。貸付自粛情報の登録内容氏名 性別 生年月日 住所 自宅電話番号(または携帯電話番号) 勤務先名 勤務先電話番号 貸付自粛情報の登録内容 氏名 性別 生年月日 住所 自宅電話番号(ま […]
  • RSS John McNeill: Spiritual Transformations

  • RSS Perspective

    • Two stories from the UK November 27, 2014
      - Remember that traditionalist complementarity of marriage conference recently held at the Vatican? The ex-Cjief Rabbi, Jonathan Sacks, gave a talk. I'd heard good things about it but when I listened to the video of the talk, I was soon disappointed by all the conservative rhetoric. It wasn't just me ... Andrew Brown has written about the lecture t […]
      noreply@blogger.com (crystal)

Why This Gay Man Takes Heart from the Feast of the Holy Family

On the recent Feast of the Holy Family my mother and I attended Mass at St. Agnes Roman Catholic Church in Port Macquarie, Australia. I’m currently in the “Great South Land” – visiting my parents, family, and friends – from my “other home” in Minnesota, USA.

As I sat waiting for the homily to begin I braced myself for a diatribe against perceived threats to the family – such as gay marriage. But I need not have worried.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure there are some members of the clerical leadership in the Australian church who would choose to use such a feast day to malign the lives and relationships of gay people. But, by-and-large, the Australian Catholic Church, I’ve discovered, reflects the wider “live and let live” ethos of Australian society. That, of course, is a far cry from the current case in the United States.

What the priest at yesterday’s Mass did talk about actually resonated with me as a gay Catholic man. He noted that, contrary to the rosy, holy card images we’re so often presented with, the reality is that Jesus’ family knew conflict and misunderstanding – just like any other family. Of course, nowhere is this more evident than in the story of the finding of the boy Jesus in the Temple.

This story served as yesterday’s Gospel reading, and in it we are presented with a young Jesus disobeying his parents; confusing, perhaps even disappointing them – all so that he can be true to the person he knew God had called him to be. As I listened to the priest describe this popular story of the Holy Family in this way, I realized that it is something to which many gay people can relate. Accordingly, it’s something to which many families can relate.

Like Jesus, young people coming into awareness of who they are sexually often have to retreat from their families so as to attune themselves to and embrace what’s awakening within them. For many gay people, answers and support are initially found outside the family. Parents are seldom the first to know that their child is gay.

These were my thoughts as I reflected upon yesterday the young Jesus leaving his family and the caravan bound for Nazareth so as to seek out the wisdom and insights of those in the Temple. I’m sure that as they busily prepared to leave Jerusalem, Mary and Joseph had instructed Jesus “not to wander off.” And yet that’s exactly what he did. He required answers and experiences beyond those which his family could provide, and so he went in search of them. This to me seems a healthy thing; a sacred journey or quest, if you like.

Once found by his parents, Jesus, in a way, “comes out” to them. He’s not the boy they thought he was. There’s definitely something different about him. He challenges them, confuses them, and, no doubt, disappoints them. Yet despite all of this they accept him as he is and, as a family, they resume their journey home together.

Sound familiar? I hope it resonates with you – especially if you’re gay, because here’s the bottom line: God calls gay people to something very special; something very sacred. God calls us to journeys of faith and consciousness that often compel us to “wander off” and seek answers elsewhere, despite the disapproval of others – even our parents, even “Mother Church.” And, no, this “something” is not a life of sexual abstinence – as the clerical leadership of the Roman expression of Catholicism would have us believe. Rather it’s a life of abundance as the relational beings that God created us to be. And, yes, God created some of us with relational capacities that are gay in orientation. Accordingly, for most gay people, a life of abundance means seeking, building, and maintaining a loving relationship with another of the same gender – a relationship that is experienced and expressed as something that is both sacred and sexual. I’ve come to believe that the seeking, building, and maintaining of such a relationship is always about “doing God’s work.”

I take to heart and am nourished and encouraged by the journeys in consciousness and compassion conveyed in the trusting, loving and accepting relational dynamics of Jesus and his family. They are journeys in and of faith. And, for me, they are what make this family – and so many others – holy.

Born and raised in rural Australia, Michael Bayly now lives in the US where he serves as the executive coordinator of the Minneapolis-based Catholic Pastoral Committee on Sexual Minorities (CPCSM). He is also the editor of The Progressive Catholic Voice, and a co-chair of the Minnesota-based Catholic Coalition for Church Reform. His book Creating Safe Environments for LGBT Students: A Catholic Schools Perspective was published in 2007 by Harrington Park Press. He established his blog The Wild Reed in 2006, as a “sign of solidarity with all who are dedicated to living lives of integration and wholeness – though, in particular, with gay people seeking to be true to both the gift of their sexuality and their Catholic faith.”

One Response

  1. The bishops remind us that the holy family is a model for us. They are fruitful bec ause they raised a child not born of their union. This model certainly applies to gay families whose fruitfulness is not based on their mutual fecundity. The bishops also point out that the fruitfulness of any marriage is based on the trinity and I would point out that that’s the love between two males(father and son) that informs all being as well as all marriage.

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